Friday Stuff
Finally got around to catching up on my WSOP episodes from this week. My mother-in-law was in town, so between the monopolization (is that a word?) of the TV for
Oprah,
Martha, and
Antiques Roadshow, and my not wanting to antagonize the family that already thinks I’m too obsessed with Pokah, I figured I’d play it tight this week.
If my father-in-law were here, you could add
The View and
Regis & Kelly to that list, although he kinda has a thing for that Martha Stewart, also. Thinks she’s one sexy woman.
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So, I finally got to see what the hubbub was all about with the slow-roll. Remind me never to piss off Jennifer Harmon. That freakin’ staredown she gave him when she got back to the table was enough for me that I wouldn’t be able to get it up for a month if she shot it at me.
[shiver]
But, how about Daniel? I mean, that dude is running bad, but what’s so freaking scary is that it’s the cards, not him. He’s spot on with his reads, and good enough to make the big laydowns. Of the hands shown, I was impressed.
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Has anyone else checked out the Bravo tourneys at bravotv.com? They are freeroll satellites to a final tournament to win a spot in a televised episode. All for charity, the prize for us is the TV spot. Anyway, you’re given 1000 chips of play money. Or, at least I thought it was play money. I took it a while back when I registered and goofed around on the ring game tables and blew it. Now, the tourneys have started and I can’t register. Looks like that was the chips you get for some fake entry fee, and if they’re gone you can’t play. I put in a helpdesk question yesterday, but so far there’s been no response.
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I set a small goal earlier this summer to read a raft of Florida-centric novels and created a list from the Pineapple Press catalog and a number of websites. I’d already blasted through a lot of stuff by Randy Wayne White, Tim Dorsey, Carl Hiaasen and John D. MacDonald. I had a list of stuff ranging from the Cracker Western series by authors like Lee Gramling to the Alex Rutledge Key West mysteries by Tom Corcoran. Pounded through those now, as well. I thoroughly enjoyed the Peter Wake/Naval Civil War books by Robert Macomber. Heading into the home stretch now with some mysteries by Les Standiford.
I always hate coming to the end of a series or an author’s catalog. I love to read an author’s books in chronological order. It’s just a thing with me. And when I’m finished, it’s like an old friend has left and won’t return for another year.
Leaves me sorta wistful.
Not in a gay way, of course. ;-)
I’ve always enjoyed reading, but stuck mainly with techno-thrillers and political intrigue. A dear friend of my wife’s family is a poet and author, and is active in the Florida writing community. Speaking with her about the workshops and book festivals she attends and the people she meets opened my eyes to the rich literary bounty of this state.
Her son is a college professor, teaching creative writing in Houston, and he laments about the sad state of writing talent among his students. Last Christmas, he pulled me aside and let me know that he had saved my Christmas letter to show his students the following semester because it was an example of how to set aside the “rules’ and write with a clear, unique voice and just tell a story. I was shocked to say the least, and profoundly grateful for the compliment.
I have not revealed to any of them the presence of this blog. I fear being ostracized for setting aside too many rules.
As an aside, my eldest daughter’s birth was referenced in a passage from one of her books,
Cruising with the Kir Queen: My Brussels Journal. She has led a fascinating life and this particular book was from a period a few years ago when her husband was employed by the US government and stationed in Brussels. I’ve read several of her books of poetry as well, and found them to be extremely passionate. Unsettlingly so. You can imagine how strange it is to read about someone’s physical longing for her husband, whose funeral you attended, or any number of other passages that make you wince and say, “Wow, what bravery it took to write THAT down”. Brutally honest stuff.
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Did I mention that I had an actual interview with an actual company yesterday?
Probably not. I didn’t think it went too well. It’s never good when someone gets you on the phone and you can tell by his questions that the first time he’s REALLY reading your resume is right then. Things like his first question:
“So, you have an MBA?”
Um, no, it says right on my resume that I started, but did not complete my MBA.
“So, you have your Six Sigma Green Belt?”
Um, no, never mentioned Six Sigma at all, although I have been through a number of courses, read a vast amount of the literature, and have used the techniques many times. But I never claimed to have a certification in something I’m not certified in. Perhaps I’m a bit too honest, given that there is no real certifying authority for Six Sigma (“um, yeah I have a Green Belt – prove I don’t!”) and it’s actually quite easy to bullshit at the Green Belt level. But, I have a little something called professional ethics.
The rest of the interview was a struggle. He was an HR professional with a number of HR certifications I was familiar with because Mrs. Big had several also. So, not only did I know how the questions would be phrased, I had helped Mrs. Big develop a ‘train-the-trainer’ manual for a consulting project she worked to teach managers in a major healthcare insurer the basics of behavioral interviewing.
So, it was all behavioral questions, but he was asking about things that seemed to be from a textbook:
“Tell me about a time you had to identify critical success factors?”
Of what? I have to identify critical success factors everyday. And then I would launch into a 5-minute explanation to cover a single project or an entire approach to a marketplace. There were times where I knew I messed up an answer, wasn’t clear, and asked if he needed clarification.
“Nope, that’s fine.”
There was also no follow-up. Typically, in a behavioral interview you ask someone about how he or she handled a situation or how he or she might handle a hypothetical scenario. After they answer, you might follow up with a question like, “And how did you do that?”. Or, if their original answer already gave that away, you might ask, “Did you consider this?”. Anything to get to another level and reveal a person’s thinking, rather than a rote reply they prepared in anticipation of your question.
Nada. Question asked, question answered, on to the next question. In fairness, because I know the format of the answer should be Situation – Action – Result, I tend to answer fully and not leave a lot of room for follow-up, but still?
He was also playing that game where the interviewer (I’m sure Otis and G-Rob are masters of this) stays silent and waits for the interviewee to fill the silence (because a void must be filled) in the hope they say something idiotic. Of the classes I did take for my MBA, I aced professional development where the professor got a kick out of running us through a surprise mock-media interview with an antagonistic reporter. I was the only one out of 60 students with sense enough to keep his mouth shut and smile at the camera for 60 seconds of dead air when the surprise question came, rather than look like a corporate tool trying to explain away some corporate malfeasance where I was not in the loop.
Otis, G-Rob, CJ: Next to a politician that refuses to get off message and answer your questions, is there anything more frustrating than a corporate hack that says, “I don’t know anything about that, I’ll get back to you later.”
The particular surprise question was when our mock company was accused of environmental violations. I got an “A” that day for not filling the void with bullshit, and shutting the fuck up.
Unlike this post.
Anyway, I was left with the distinct impression that the most important questions were:
- MBA
- Green Belt
- Salary
- Nothing else, unless I said something racist, sexist, or any other example of profound retardation.
The salary was spot on their target. The first two, not so much. One out of three I get to the next interview. Don’t like them odds.
